Hey, Mom! Can You Handle The Truth?



IMG_1937A vacation, when we’re really lucky, gives a family the opportunity to bond, share old memories and make new ones. That was my hope for our recent family trip to the mountains.

Now that my kids are young adults, my son is twenty-one and my daughter 19, (Yikes!) I felt it was safe to ask them if my way of parenting worked for them when they were growing up. Of course I wouldn’t ask this question if I wasn’t fairly confident they would say, “You were a great mother! I wouldn’t change anything! When I have kids I’m going to rear them in exactly the same way!”

Ha! Woman plans and God laughs.

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5 Questions to Help Figure Out: Who is My Family?



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While we do not have a choice of the family we are born into, we can choose the people we call our family.

And that is okay!

Last night I was at dinner with my Dad and he introduced me to a man who he has known for a long time. As I talked with this man I noticed that he seemed sad. He was not sad about his life choices, he was sad about not having a relationship with his family. He felt betrayed by his family.

This left me thinking: What is family? Is it your “crazy” Uncle that makes everyone at dinner squirm and leaves you with your anxiety jumping from a 2 to a 10 within a matter of seconds? Or is it your best friend who calls and leaves you a voicemail, knowing you won’t pick up, because they know your day is filled with stress, but just wants you to know they are there for you.

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“He ignored me. He must think I’m fat!”: Eating Disorders & Cognitive Distortions



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Editor’s Note: This post was contributed by EWN psychotherapist Nicole Newcomb.

Eating disorders are plagued by twisted thinking. In my business we call this twisted thinking cognitive distortions. You know, those thoughts that all sound right in your head but you would never say them to someone else. These distortions can tear down self-esteem, chip away at our identities and lead us to believe we are failures.

How many times have you told yourself you “should not” eat anything above 100 calories or you “should be” exercising multiple hours daily? How many times has someone given you a compliment and you say something to deny it like “Oh thanks but I’m really not skinny, I’m fat.” Thinking errors like these can lead down a dangerous road to anxiety, depression and possibly an eating disorder.

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Four Elements of a Good Marriage



When it comes to marriage, a mentor of mine said, there are no rules. As long as there are Two Consenting Adults, the possible types of marriage are infinite. You can have bi-cultural marriages, bi-racial, bi-coastal, marriages blending different religions, arranged marriages, open marriages, May-December couples, straight, gay and transgender. Traditional or not, all that matters is that the two adults involved agree on what defines their particular coupling.

Two. Consenting. Adults.

After that what are the elements of a good marriage? Everyone wants to know that, right? What my mentor said was a bit surprising. He said that after doing a meta-analysis of studies on happily married couples, researchers boiled down the corner stones of a good marriage to four:

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